Thursday, February 01, 2007

Killin' My Pride

As many of you could tell, I was having a hard day yesterday. But thankfully, my good friend Denna had decided to take me and our friend Lori out for my birthday; and that was today. Which was something fun to look forward to, and got my mind off of my Mom-less house.

But yesterday, my eyes were swollen and red no matter what I tried to think about. People at church were asking me how she liked her visit, and how long she was here, and how they enjoyed seeing her, and Bless My Heart, I'd start tearing up all over again. So, in service last night, I would try not to think about all this, and think of perfectly random, non-related things instead.

OK. THAT was a lesson in futility.

No matter what it was, there seemed to be some connection or memory of Mom. Even someone who I barely ever talk to reminded me of Mom, because I've played Scrabble with that person! How terribly annoying!

When my "little sister" Laura saw my face after church, I think it was obvious to her that something had to be done about my pitiful state. She told me that if I met her at her house after church, she would give me a facial. Who would pass that up? Not I! So I gladly agreed, seeing as how my face hurt from being constantly scrunched in that ugly "crying face." A facial sounded like just the ticket.

I helped Chris put the kids to bed and scooted over to Laura's house. She had a foot massager, and lotions, and scrubbers, and of course the facial stuff. Ooo La LA! I could definitely handle being pampered for a little bit. It was going to be a nice end to a hard day.

And it was. I was pampered and fussed over and generally spoiled, and I relaxed. I actually talked about Mom without breaking down.


Once the facial part was over, Laura noticed that I had more than a few offending hairs between my nose and my northern lip. Laura would be the type to notice such things, as she is still in her teen years, and is generally more conscientious than I. She's the glamour girl, I'm the tomboy. It is her mission to make me fashionable at the very least. And the fact that I hadn't promptly removed said hair before last night.....well, this was a problem, you see!

Not that I don't try to take care of such things on a regular basis (thanks to her), but with the baby and all....time had gotten away from me. Fine. I don't care. Take care of it, La. This is what facials are for, right?

So she breaks out some hair removal cream. Alright. Sounds like a plan. Shouldn't be any pain involved.

However, Laura makes a habit of not reading directions.

For if she had, she would have probably read something to the effect of, "Do not use this hair removal product after exfoliating your face." Or something of that nature.

It soon became painfully obvious that facials and hair removal cream do NOT go hand in hand.


"Uh, La??"


"I didn't know this stuff was supposed to hurt...."

"Well, huh. It didn't hurt when I used it. But maybe it does for some people. I know bleaching stuff kinda stings, so maybe that's why."


(((10 minutes later))) "Man! this stuff STINGS! I'm taking it off!"

And after wiping it all off, my upper lip was throbbing and sensitive to the touch....

....not to mention BRIGHT RED.



And the irony of the whole thing was that we gals get RID of facial hair because it's "too manly."

But a bright red streak between my nose and my lip didn't do anything but make me look MORE manly. Like, I had a red moustache or something! Ack!

Yet, just to prove that I'm not vain, and that I'm not prideful, I WENT to that luncheon with my friends Denna and Lori-----red milk moustache and all. Yup. I "stuck out my upper lip" and swallowed my pride and enjoyed every minute of that Chinese buffet this afternoon.

(But I didn't go to the bank or the store like I wanted to.......a girl can only take so much pride killin' in one day!)


Anonymous said...

"ewww..LA LA"
That was very sweet of her. She's done a massage on my face before. It's right up there with Tammy Slaten's relaxation techniques.
I love you Sister Kel!

JeniBeans said...

Ummm, okay, well, first of all, hair removal creams are a no-no.

Harsh chemicals on your FACE?


And I have to add that the red moustache probably just accentuated your Irish background, no?